If you don't live under a rock and your kids forced you to join social media or you're a really tech savvy parent, you've probably come across #Formnigani on the 'interweb'.  What is it? #Formnigani is a movement meant to amplify the voices of young Kenyans in favour of family planning. The theme of 'Form ni gani?' means 'What's the plan?' in Sheng.  A street slang form of Kiswahili.
The movement was launched recently. A couple of 'pregnant' men kicked off the campaign in their 'maternity suits' on social media by posing the question 'What if men got pregnant?'.
It sparked an interesting conversation on sex and contraceptives especially amongst young people in Kenya.
One glaring issue that emerged from this campaign was the fact that most Kenyan parents have never had 'the talk' with their kids. Granted, its super awkward to talk to your tween/teen about condoms and 'getting down' but it's vital to have this conversation with your child.
Your 'tweenager' may not ask you directly, but that doesn't mean they don't have questions or concerns. Kids need information, and they often get a lot of wrong information from all the wrong places and people.  You've probably seen the flavoured condom ads before the watershed period and you sensed the awkwardness with your teen and your 5-year-old wanted to get the strawberry one and didn't understand why you said no.
Sex has always been a taboo topic in Kenyan Society. We're proud prudes when it comes to sex. Growing up, our parents told us babies were bought from the supermarket or mum swallowed a baby that's why her tummy looked so full. Yeah, I know. Confusing. Kenyan parents have always avoided talking to their kids about coitus. Most of us had to figure it out all by ourselves with often disastrous results.
Mum and dad, you can longer avoid having this conversation with your kid. Especially not in this age of the internet where warped up information on sex is just a click away.
The best way to start a discussion is to take advantage of "teachable moments," those everyday events that provide a perfect opening. If you know someone who is pregnant, talk with your teen about it. If you're watching a Durex TV ad on figure out if this can spark a conversation about sexuality.
Sometimes the best time to bring up this uncomfy topic is in the car or on a walk when you aren't sitting face to face which can be awkward. Avoid the direct, head-on approach - if you ask your tween/teen if they want to talk about sex, they'll probably say, "NO!"
A good icebreaker is to ask about your teen's friends: "Are your friends starting to date? What do you think about that?" It's a fun and light way to start the conversation.  You can talk about boyfriends and girlfriends and hormones and why it's important not to cave in to peer pressure and that sex isn't going out of fashion anytime soon so it's better to wait.
Friendships and romantic relationships are a vital part of a teenager's life - judgment and criticism can shut down a conversation. So don't be too uppity about this. Make your teenager feel free to talk to you about these things. Be a friend to your child and not some righteous, high handed authority figure.
Aim for a conversation rather than a lecture. Sometimes we talk a lot because there's so much we want to tell our teens! When they ask a question, respond simply and find out what more they want to know. Make sure there will be more chances to talk in the future.
If things get super awkward between you when talking to your kid about sex, its ok to fall back. It's totally fine to say, "I'd like to answer that question, but I first need to think about what I want to say." Just make sure you answer the question later.
You need to accept that your tween/teen will probably have sex before you think they're ready, or before you want them to. Because of this, you need to make sure they're prepared. They should always use a condom, so be firm about telling them that. The HIV statistics in Kenya are proof that this is a very important issue to discuss.
Let them know about the other methods of contraception and their success rate. Finally, be clear about sexually-transmitted diseases and infections, how they can catch them, what they look like and when to get tested for them. Being safe is the mature, responsible way of having sex and if they are not ready for that kind of responsibility, then they aren't ready for sex.
Emphasize to your 'tweenager' that sex is something that should be saved for a loving, committed relationship. They need to know that you expect them to respect themselves and their partners and that sexual activeness is not a status symbol. They are not losers if they haven't had sex yet or if they want to wait.
It's also very essential to talk to your kids about consent and sexual abuse.  Here's a fan fact, research shows that kids who get 'the talk' are unlikely to have sex earlier. Actually, they are in fact likely to delay their sexual debut than those that haven't had 'the talk' with mum and dad. 'The talk' is a way to show your children how much you value their well-being and health.